Family and friends 'surprised' by Nigel Latta's death

A family friend of Nigel Latta said the clinical psychologist and popular media personality accepted his fate after being moved into hospice last week.

"It was last Wednesday he went to see the oncologist and that's when he was told that his body couldn't take the treatment any more," family spokesperson, Bridgette Tapsell, told RNZ's Midday Report.

Latta was diagnosed with gastric cancer in 2024. He died on Tuesday and his wife, Natalie Flynn, announced the 58-year-old's death on Wednesday morning.

"You've never seen anyone fight as hard as Nigel fought," Tapsell said.

"But he pivoted from being really optimistic last Wednesday to just being accepting, which would be incredibly difficult to do. He said he had had the most wonderful life. He was happy and he was at peace," Tapsell said.

"I was quite surprised that it happened within a week."

Tapsell said his friends and family were feeling a bit lost and incredibly sad.

"Natalie was an incredible carer for Nigel in the last days of his life.

"He also had his family there and his best friend, Ian. They were also in the room when he actually passed. They just have a - or had a - love that is the kind of love that you read about, that you rarely see in couples, kind of a true modern day love story."

Latta left behind a love letter for Flynn, who he wed in in 2023, Tapsell said.

“He was asking her to promise him to find joy after he passed.”

Latta was known for his deep dives into the psyches of criminals, troubled teens and parents, and for tackling gnarly social issues like obesity, poverty, and child abuse.

Prime Minister Christopher Luxon said he was also deeply saddened by the news of Latta's death.

"Like so many Kiwis, Amanda and I read his books on parenting when our kids were younger," Luxon wrote on Facebook.

"He had a remarkable ability to connect with people through his writing and broadcasting with empathy, humour, and insight.

"Our thoughts are with his family and all who knew and loved him."

Latta was also the ambassador of charitable initiative Kenzie’s Gift - named after author Nic Russell’s daughter, who died of cancer in 2005.

The charity raised more than $100,000 with Latta’s talks, used to support the mental health of young people affected by grief and serious illness in the family.

Russell said Latta was “a legend and changemaker” and will be terribly missed.

“When Nigel himself got diagnosed with aggressive cancer last year, it was heartbreaking. This wonderful, wonderful man who had done so much for us in the community throughout New Zealand in many aspects of his life to face that challenge too.”

She said “his humanity and compassion knew no bounds”.

“It’s a great loss to everyone in this country as well as his family and his immediate loved ones. We will all desperately feel his death and I will miss him terribly as will everybody I think and there are no words.

“I think all we can take is [that we are] grateful that we had Nigel in our lives, the difference he made. We've all loved him and we've all enjoyed him and benefited from him, his wit, his knowledge, his courage, all of it. He's been an amazing man.”

Children’s Commissioner Dr Claire Achmad told RNZ she was saddened to hear of his death and sent aroha to his whānau.

“I had the privilege of meeting Nigel a few times, and what always struck me was his deep commitment, energy and expertise in relation to children and psychology. Through his work, he shared ideas for how we can weave stronger families and whānau in our country.

“Through his broadcasting and community engagement, he made these conversations accessible and engaging, always sharing practical tips and suggestions for the little things we can do to better support children and young people.

“I’ve no doubt that his impact and legacy will be lasting.”

HarperCollins published most of Latta’s parenting books, The Politically Incorrect Guide to Teenagers and The Politically Incorrect Guide to Parenting. His most recent was Lessons on Living published on the day he died.

“He was an incredible person; he was so generous right to the last moment,” HarperCollins Publishers New Zealand said in a statement.

“He leaves the nation with a beautiful gift in the shape of a new book, a marvellous insight into his life well-lived with joy and consideration to what matters most, published very coincidently on the same day as his passing."

Latta presented long list of documentaries and television series including Beyond the Darklands and the Politically Incorrect parenting shows. Most recently, he presented the TVNZ show You've Been Scammed.

In a statement, TVNZ said they were “deeply saddened” to hear the news of Latta's death.

“Nigel was a trusted voice on our screens for two decades.

“He dedicated his life to helping others through their toughest challenges and we hear from our viewers regularly about the impact Nigel’s programmes have had on them.

“Nigel’s life was spent giving, guiding, and caring - he will be profoundly missed and our thoughts are with this loved ones.”

In 2012, Latta was appointed an Officer of the New Zealand Order of Merit for services to psychology.